The Beatitudes of the Christian Far Right

November 3, 2005

If the Christian Far Right had their way, the Beattitudes of Matthew 5 might look like this:

Lazy are the Poor in Society, for they can’t see that if they were in the will of God, they’d be rich by now.

Sentimental are they who mourn, for don’t they know that we’ll see that person in heaven…pull it together, this is a Joyous “sending out” day.

Useless are the Meek, for they let the Democrats have all the great Mall marches.

Important are those who hunger and thirst for self-righteousness, for they shall be elected to write all our laws.

Traitors are the Merciful, for can’t they see that it’s a waste of God’s money to feed people in countries where they can’t even contribute to the Coalition.

Annoying are the Pure in Heart, for they keep talking about ethics. Talk to Bill Clinton and his womanizing heart, and stop pointing out how Pat Robertson issued a Fatwah against an elected South American President.

Wimpy are the Peacemakers, for they’re being duped by the Ecumenical Movement.

Blessed are you if you are persecuted for right-thinking’s sake, for you will get Justice if we appoint Pat, Pat and Jerry to the Supreme Court.



  1. Grade: A+

    This is outstanding

  2. I really doubt that whoever posted this, if he or she is a Christian, is really upset with the Christian Coalition altogether. The organization is pro-family, pro-life, and is merely concerned that good people do not sit and do nothing. What should the alternative be? Would you prefer we Christians do nothing, or allow Christian leaders with your political ideology run everything until you can be pacified. Stop whining! Just because you may not like one or a few aspects of C.C I would like know why you seem to be disparaging the entire organization. For those of you who aren’t familiar with the C.C. go to http://www.cc.org and look at the their legislative agenda for this congressional session and tell me what you disagree with. It sounds like your disagreement is more with Pat Robertson and Jerry Fallwell types than the organization as a whole, am I wrong? Thank you.

  3. Jerry Falwell is the titular head of the organization, even if he is no longer the President. These days, Jerry and Pat Robertson are tied in with so many different topics that it is hard to distinguish between them. I have no problem with Christians acting to change our society. I do have a problem with Christians thinking that one must adopt a particular party, platform, or political ideology to be a good Christian.

    I actually think that Christians in politics have been going downhill since Wilberforce. I am interested to hear of one genuine change for the better that a Christian has proposed and carried through on in government in the past 100 years.

  4. Beautiful, and I’m linking back to this. Funny, it sounds that elissa misunderstood your use of Pat/Jerry (as representative of the CC) in the same way that you at first misunderstood my reference to Dobson (as representative of Colorado Springs), LOL.

    I’ll be interested to hear your opinion of Carter’s new book if you decide to give it a read. It’s on my to-do list, but that list is long. I’m considering getting it on audiobook to make that easier. Anyway, I’ve heard a couple interviews with former President Carter, and found myself impressed with his Christian conviction and his intellectual analysis.

  5. My problems with Christians in politics is the tremendous effort put into legislating the letter of the (spiritual)law rather than putting that effort into changing the hearts of the people to accept the spirit of the law. Legislation is only going to hide the problem that exists in the hearts of the people. Changing the logistics of the law without changing the hearts of the people can give a false impression of the spiritual state of the union. Passing legislation without changing the hearts of the people gives an outward apperance of righteouness without the internal conviction of why they are chosing to do so. Expending those same energies and resources into changing hearts, instead of changing laws, would make the necessity for legislative righteousness unnecessary.

  6. I made a mistake in first commenting, since I’m new to this blog, in that I didn’t realize that all of the primary contributors to this blog are pastors, and…obviously Christians. I wasn’t sure who was posting, sorry. I do want to comment on the fact that I think the pastoral staff’s comments in regards to Falwell and Robertson are just fallacious-purely ad hominem or genetic. It doesn’t matter who the president was at one time or who is the puppeteer behind the curtain, presently. That is simply irrelevant. If you want to make the case that a similar ideology is mistaken, fine; but don’t take down C.C with it (of course you seem to think that nearly everyone in the C.C does have that same mindset). The C.C is more than those two, even if there are others who think like them. As I mentioned before, go and check out the legislative agenda and tell me, cogently, what it is a reasonable Christian can disagree with. Attack the ideas, not the men. I do agree that certain Christian leaders just need to permanantly have their mouths sown shut (see Robertson’s irresponsible comments recently about the Dover, PA county in regards to the evolution issue-totally dumb). I do want to say that embedded in your comments is probably a dissatisfaction with the fact that some conservative Christians in the public eye tend to stick there foot in there mouths too often and offend, disinfranchise, and make the Faith look unattractive. That is very sad. I hope that the C.C is less like this than they should be. I do want to say that I, partially, agree with your comments about Christians in politics over the last hundred years. Most of everything Christians have done to contribute to our culture over the the last century has been mediocre at best.

  7. In deference to Elissa’s point, I am renaming this post. It really isn’t fair to just go after the CC, since they are only one of many who are confusing conservative christianity with conservative politics.

  8. Elissa:
    Thank you for your wise comments. Indeed, today’s church, whether conservative or “progressive” does tend to stick its foot in its mouth more often than a group relying on the wisdom of the Holy Spirit has any reason to.

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