I like to see people who take the Bible seriously.
Here is what I mean.
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Love it! Thanks for the link. I added “damomma” to my favorites!
Hysterical, wasn’t it? I think my parents would get the joke, but my grandmother might not be so amused. I (heart) this blog…she’s fabulous.
Love that you changed your template; while I liked the colors of the old one, I found it difficult to read because of its layout. If you want anything different that’s just yours (since about a million bloggers use this one, LOL), just let me know — I’m happy to design for free.
Alli: This is why I changed the design…I couldn’t always read it that well. I used to be good at HTML, but now I can’t seem to tell the difference between comment tags and the ones that show up. I might need your help with it.
Twoboysmom…damomma is well written (she’s a professional writer I think) and always funny. You’ll like her.
A very healing piece on divorce, but I’m uncomfortable with the statement, “The Bible never calls divorce a sin.” Don’t take me wrong—I understand there are circumstances where the divorce option is not a sin. But as an experienced sinner and divorced person I can say that most of the time divorce is indeed a sin. There, I said it… please don’t chastise the messenger but permit me to elaborate.
In my case, sin started even before we got married because we lived together (shacking up as Dr. Laura would call it). From there, it just went downhill because we were both self-centered people who were disobedient to God’s will in our lives and marriage. I was a verbally abusive jerk, she cheated, and we divorced. How’s that for too much honesty? I was able to move on—forgiving and accept forgiveness—only after I stopped making excuses and came to grips with the fact that it was a sin. I had sinned, she had sinned, and we resolved it with a sin. We were both disobedient to our covenant before God.
Mark 10 and Matthew 19 contain some strong language from our Lord expressing His displeasure with divorce. Let’s not play the lawyer game in hopes of finding loopholes. When God says, “Therefore, what God has joined together, let man not separate,” I think he means it. If we choose to come against the will of God isn’t that disobedience? And isn’t disobedience sin?
Brokenness and acknowledging sin was my road to healing.
A very healing piece on divorce, but I’m uncomfortable with the statement, “The Bible never calls divorce a sin.” Don’t take me wrong—I understand there are circumstances where the divorce option is not a sin. But as an experienced sinner and divorced person I can say that most of the time divorce is a sin. There, I said it… please don’t chastise the messenger. Permit me to elaborate.
Mark 10 and Matthew 19 contain some strong language from our Lord expressing his displeasure with divorce. Let’s not play the lawyer game in hopes of finding loopholes. When God says, “Therefore, what God has joined together, let man not separate”, I think he means it. If we choose to come against the will of God isn’t that disobedience, and isn’t disobedience sin?
Here’s what I think divorce & sin are: Divorce is not the sin itself, but there are multiple sins leading up to a divorce. I believe that Pastor Mike said this. Divorce is just the result. The reason everyone looks at divorce as a sin, is that no one is looking at why the divorce happened, and therein lies the sin. In my case, we did the same thing, we moved in together prior to the wedding, and though I knew it was wrong, I wanted out of my house. I knew how God felt about me moving in with him, and just took the thought that we’ll be married shortly anyways…. wrong, not much of our marriage was Christian based. I went to church most Sundays, he rarely did. He said he was a Christian but wouldn’t go to church or get involved. I was left with a dilemna…. I would go & be mad at him for not going, I would get involved & get mad at him for not getting involved. What’s funny about this is that somewhere I thought that because I was involved in church that somehow I was immune to the threat of divorce. I was not going to let Satan win, I wasn’t going to let him destroy our marriage. But he did, with our help. I don’t want to put this all on him, I know I wasn’t perfect, but I also am learning that nothing I could have done would have changed what he did.
In most divorces a lot of sin does indeed precede the actual divorce. It’s one of the most depressing realities of life that the same couple who were so happy and hopeful when they got married can hurt each other so deeply as the years go by. For many hurting couples divorce is almost like a suicide; they just want the pain to end.
I also understand that when one person in the marriage decides it’s over, the other person has no choice. So I can accept that for many people the divorce itself was not a sin. There are probably other scenarios where divorce is not a sin.
It’s complicated, but I believe it’s also dangerous to view divorce as if it were something inanimate like a gun. The NRA uses the argument that guns don’t kill people; people kill people. It’s the argument that the gun itself is not evil. At least with a gun you can go out and shoot paper or clay targets and have some fun. I’m not sure divorce is not dangerous every time it’s used.
Maybe we should view divorce as the least of bad alternatives—sort of like voting for the politician you dislike the least.
And another thing: it’s just my opinion but I believe the responsibility for most divorces in the church today—I’m speaking in generalities here—can be laid at the feet of men (by the way, I am a man). Men and women should read John Eldredge’s book, “Wild at Heart” for a glimpse into the flaw we men carry that distorts what we seek in our relationships with women. It’s an eye opener and probably a window into why divorce is so prevalent.
I agree that sometimes (how’s that for a peacemaker) divorce itself is a sin. I know at a particular point in my marriage I would have been cleared to walk out based on some of the “approved” reasons and I had other christians telling me to do so. However, I had God telling me to stay. If I had left, the divorce would have been a sin. I chose to stay and throw myself into the lord. He saved my marriage and over many years has brought complete healing. We have a wonderful marriage now, even though some years were painful (emotionally) to go through.
I think Mike is correct that you have to take it on a case by case basis. But I am uncomfortable saying that divorce is not a sin because that statement can be used to justify an action that may be a sin before God.
Just to clarify…I said the Bible doesn’t call Divorce a sin. However, I agree with TBM that some divorces are a sin if the Father in heaven has told the person not to get a divorce. But that then becomes an issue between the individual and God.
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